I had a poster of The Four Agreements on my office wall for years. Yet, I’d never read Don Miguel-Ruiz’s wisdom book, The Four Agreements, until last year.
A peer 3 Vital Questions trainer reminded me of them. She showed me her framed copy of The Four Agreements on the wall behind her desk one afternoon. So, I downloaded the audiobook before flying to Melbourne to visit my daughter. I got to immerse myself in Don Miguel-Ruiz’ words as if I were listening to a meditation. It is a short book, just about as long, as the flight from the Sunshine Coast to Melbourne.
The Four Agreements, if you have not heard of them, are:
BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
Your best is going to change from moment to moment. It will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
The book goes into greater depth, is simple to understand and could become a meditative practice in how it unfolds. I’ve since listened to it three more times. I’ve found the teachings of the Four Agreements pertinent to all I’m working on for my personal and professional life.
What I could see was that the Four Agreements are closely connected to the work I am certified in as a 3VQ trainer with The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic. The combination of the 3 Vital Questions framework and the TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) roles of creator, challenger and coach. The Four Agreements support the TED* roles, and consciously practising the TED* roles, therefore, is living by the Four Agreements.
When living by the TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) principles and the creator mindset, as referred to in our work, these are feelings I’ve experienced personally and heard shared by other trainers and our clients. Life looks and feels like this:
Whereas the opposite to the creator mindset, that is victim mindset and the dreaded drama triangle’s roles of victim, persecutor and rescuer, life and work will feel and look more like this:
I’m so grateful for the words of Don Miguel Ruiz right now. Equally appreciative of the deeply transformative work of David Emerald and Donna Zajonc, the founders and leaders at The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic.
What is wonderful is that we get to choose who we are, how we operate and relate to ourselves and others, and the daily actions we take.
If you’d like to find out more about either The Four Agreements or The Empowerment Dynamic, I include principles of both in my coaching and training.
You can contact me using this form or book a time directly in my scheduler for a conversation.
Take care of yourself,
Susan