Honesty as a Core Value

Honesty is a popular Core Value to choose.

“A ‘No’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘Yes’ merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble.”

Mahatma Gandhi

Learning to say ‘No’ and thus avoiding the ‘Yes Trap’ is a huge turning point in many lives, at all stages – childhood to old age.

It can make the difference between feeling peace, calm and clarity or anxiety, stress and worry.

Saying ‘No’ isn’t the only example of honesty but it is one that regularly comes up and we address in coaching very easily.

An example that’s common:

My client’s 30yo adult daughter decided to move back home from Sydney and work remotely during Covid, to save money. To a 2-bed apartment that’s got not only my client & husband but their other family to and fro.

Hectic and crowded is a light way to describe how a day became.

30yo pulls out a mattress to sleep in the lounge – not thinking it’s a problem to leave it under everyone’s feet, so mum puts it away each morning, tired of asking.

30yo expects ‘silence’ to work in and everyone ‘should’ go out when she has a Zoom call.

I asked my client, who was out, having her coaching via her mobile, in her car, have you thought to say ‘no’, set out your house rules, ask how long she’s staying?

Her list of reasons for not upsetting this ‘she was always difficult’ child, now-30yo adult, rolled so easily, so the spinning went on.

We tried a ‘Power of No’ session.

The 7-step session that included practice of how to say ‘no’, gave my client so many new options.

Bottom line, 30yo realised that living like this was not her best option, and she found a better living arrangement to ‘adult’ in.

Win/Win all round 💯

Do you ever find yourself tolerating something, unable to say what you’d really like, in order to avoid upsetting someone, so that you can avoid conflict?

Where does the conflict sit, if avoided?

Does it evaporate or does it find a space within you to simmer away?

• If you’re feeling Honesty is a Core Value, yet the words above resonate, it could indicate you’re living out of alignment with your Core Values.
• A ‘Power of No’ 1:1 session is possibly worth considering. Please contact me for more details.

Contact me to talk about a Power of No Session or to book a mini-series of coaching available now that defines your Top 5 Core Values. Both are absolutely the most perfect starting points to come from in the new year that is 2021.