August 2011, just past mid-year of a year of incredible change for me. The photo is me on a dawn walk with husband, Tom, at Broadbeach. It was the day we were beginning a week’s immersion at Date With Destiny.
2011 was one of those life-changing years, unexpectedly (thanks for the invite BH). It challenged and enlightened, filled me with love, had me experience raw reality. I met incredible people and together, we chose vulnerability, to test our many boundaries in life, relationships, health, wealth and business.
2011 was a year I consciously started taking time to craft the rest of my life from a new perspective, my short and long term goals, and what my life would look like, when lived authentically with purpose.
However, it’s not like a Bewitched ‘wiggle of the nose‘ can make it all change right away.
Ground work and strategy are needed to make change possible. That is, if you plan to not hurt or lose yourself or anyone of importance in your life, in the process.
Change that affects a business and whole life takes time, upheaval, honesty, risk, sacrifice and strategy.
The world goes on too, whilst in the midst of change. Battles, business trends, industry shifts, life events, transitions occur or even increase, that have people asking ‘what did you do for all of this to happen to you right now?‘
Even when all the goals are shining bright and your head is in the right space, the cheeky old habits, self-talk, others talk and ego want things to stay as they are. Overwhelm, stress, tiredness, a touch of adrenal burnout, peri-menopause, then menopausal symptoms, can all take their toll.
Fill yourself up with good stuff
It takes quiet self-work, discipline and commitment to facilitate real change. Yes we hear the clatter of others, and try to discern what is real and what is drama. We deal with responsibilities around us and then know it’s time to re-centre. Meditation, journalling, massage, filling ourselves up with good stuff: audiobooks, books, podcasts. Having an accountability partner. Education in what inspires us, time in nature and creativity. All this good stuff goes towards giving ourselves space for change to unfold.
Surround yourself with believers
Personally, apart from a few key trusted people and my family, I didn’t find sharing with the world what I was going to do, or what I was going through, very helpful. It’s unfortunate, but people get uneasy with other people making change. People get frustrated and judgmental with you if you say you’re going to do something, but it doesn’t magically happen. You know how you can then weirdly seem to do or say the exact opposite every time you see those people!
In normal business and personal relationships, change isn’t easily embraced by those around us, when we’re bouncing around with the energy of a bunny. People really would just like us to shut the f*#k up and settle the f*#k down!
In my case, I had not only my beautiful husband and daughters believing in me, but I surrounded myself with believers, authentic change-seekers and other business leaders, similar to myself.
Effecting real change is tricky
If you’re looking for real change, be aware it requires you to observe and listen to people you love without judgment, who either hope you’ll stay as you are, or step back down to earth. That’s their comfort zone not yours.
Also, if you have children, they have this way of looking through your eyes into your heart and soul and wish for you to cut the crap, to get a wriggle on (I know, I know!) and walk the talk, not just talk it!
It’s hard to please everyone, so stick to your own pace and believe you can do this!
The gift of a life coach
I gave myself the gift of a life coach. That was the best gift I could have got! She and I matched each other well. She had experience across business and life that was well placed to give me coaching perfect for me. With her support I loosened the shackles of the past, to let them slip gently off with a quiet clang to the floor, and set up a plan to walk into the future.
The beauty of confiding in a coach is coaching is all about change, options, choices, dealing with beliefs, fears and stories. A coach is a guide along the new pathway. A belief and accountability partner in what you say you will do, and making it happen. My coach kept me accountable to make my goals a ‘must’.
Finding time and space
Slowly, slowly, we need to be OK to find the time and space to drop being an achiever, needing to fit in, fake it, lose a title, the ego, the stories, the habits, to find who we are and what we’re here for.
For me, that involved taking a leap of faith, selling a business rather than stay. I got to travel in a year full of magic moments and meet people who I am happy to call my international friends.
I took time to acknowledge my skills and talents, become clear on my values, doing deep work on my purpose. I gave myself time to enhance my skills and talents with formal education ie. I’m not one for faking it!
Tom and I have also successfully started 2 new businesses in the past year, doing what we love. Initial challenges like all new businesses, getting the funds rolling, but everyday is us getting up to do what we want to do.
Like the photo above, I get to get up at sunrise, meditate and go walk in nature and remember how very lucky I am to have the choices I have.
It’s humbling, peaceful, clarifying, simplifying. I’m pretty sure I wrote at least 3 of those words once as a vision for where I want to be one day.
Change at first may feel scary
All that said, change at first may feel scary, if change is what you’re seeking. When you mix that with challenging yourself to being coached, to get 100% real, share confidentially things you’ve never shared before, results begin to happen.
To effect massive change is a journey of many, many small experiences and goals. Small 1 year goals, to 3 and 10 year goals and lifetime goals, all involve action.
How you manage yourself through these: whether well, poorly, you ignore what’s not important, or ignore what is important, is part of the journey of learning new ways.
It is doable, is all I can say. Change towards living life on your terms is incredibly rewarding and increases your opportunity to experience wonder.
I will support you in making massive change
Coaching with me will provide the support and belief in you to make massive change, in life and business. Change that is values-based, purpose-driven, focused on your strengths. To find a way forward, using all of those for you, those you love and the greater good and life will indeed be good!
If you’re in a place where you no longer want to accept that THIS IS IT, I’d love to talk to you about that. Contact me via the Contact Form below or Schedule a First Session and we can go from there.